Doing IT
Two Weeks Of Soul Searching
Song of the day: Private Party - India Arie
This is the first post of my two-week Soul Search. I have been wanting to really dig deep and find myself again for a while. Three months ago, I discovered that I did not know who I was anymore. I couldn't tell you who Sierra was without getting lost within the first two minutes of my self-description. I know who I want to be and who I was. But at the present moment, I do not see either of those women when I look in the mirror.
This two-week Soul Search is an effort to help me scrape off some of the insecurities and self-doubt I have collected. Hopefully, by the end of these two weeks, I will have started to carve out a beautiful and inspired new Si.
Goals
Nothing can be achieved without some clear cut planning and goals. So here is what I want to get out of my soul search.
Mindfulness :
My mind is always racing a million miles a second. I've known about the practice of mindfulness for a minute, but I always tell myself I am too busy to try it. During the next two weeks, I want to try and take at least 15 minutes a day to practice being aware of "the now."
Joy :
I have not been genuinely happy since January of this year. I used to walk around with a smile on my face and a pair of positivity glasses on. Those two items were essential to the Sierra aesthetic. Now they only make special appearances. Within these next two weeks, I would like to find out what stole my joy and reclaim it as mine.
Clarity:
Like I said my mind is always racing. This constant thought process often leaves me feeling lost. I'm coming up on my last year of college and I could not feel more confused. It is a little too late for me to drop out. For this goal, I am going to try to journal every day for the next two weeks. At the end of this, I just want to have an idea about my future.
Inspiration:
This goal is different than the others. I have a bunch of different ideas that are have been inspired by various life experiences. This goal is more so based on having the inspiration to follow through with those ideas. Maybe by August 4th, I'll be inspired to introduce a new project.
Confidence :
I used to be extremely confident, possibly overtly so. But now I'm in this ehh place. Where I have to try and find what I actually like about myself. I think this goes back to me not knowing who I am or what I like anymore. My plan of action for gaining more confidence is faking it until I make it. As well as reciting daily mantras.
Getting to It
Of course I won't be an entirely new person after two weeks. But that doesn't mean these next two weeks can't lead me to an improved version of my current self. Here goes nothing!
“I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul”
FYI: I have decided to share this journey with the interwebz so I can hold myself accountable.